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One of my goals is to teach people how to more effectively advocate for themselves. A strategy that I’ve found to be helpful is creating a script. This helps you practice ahead of crucial conversations and serves as a back-up from which you can read if needed.
Here is an example of a script for a very difficult conversation:
“Your chronic abusive behavior has created a toxic living environment. I am unwilling to continue interacting with you until you receive treatment. My goal in doing this is to protect myself and my family from further exposure to an environment that puts our wellbeing at risk.
In regard to treatment, I would recommend as a first step completing one of the following self-help books based on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy:
(1) Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life
(2) Learning to Thrive: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook
(3) Reclaim Your Life: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in 7 Weeks
(4) The Wisdom to Know the Difference: An Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Workbook for Overcoming Substance Abuse
If you’re in need of more intensive therapy, I would recommend finding a therapist trained in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. They are listed on the Association for Contextual Behavioral Science website at https://contextualscience.org/“
Clearly this would not be the FIRST step in addressing concerns with a person’s behavior. However, planning for the worst-case scenario is important to put things in perspective. How far are you willing to go to ensure you’re acting in accordance with your values?